Travel

If you would like to follow our trip, we will be posting here.

It has been an exciting 5 days getting everything in place for our trip. There is nothing I could write to truly express the fullness of my heart right now. I am exceedingly thankful to be on this journey. Last night I had the sweetest dream about Grant - he was so full of joy. I am having a difficult time leaving all of our precious children, but my joy is also deep.

Skip and I will fly out of Chicago on Thanksgiving and get to China on Friday night. We will see our precious son's face IN PERSON on Monday morning at 10 AM.

We appreciate all of your prayers - Thank you!

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Packing & Looking Towards Him

I am so excited how God keeps showing me how crucial each step has been. I think a lot as I wrap Christmas presents and pack and it has been so beautiful to see how each disappointment, waits that were too long and closed doors were ALL for the landscape of the journey. It is a great journey and He is so mighty to turn tears into His Glory. And although Grant is one of the largest blessings in my life - this was not about Grant or adoption. I am claiming freedom in areas that I did not know were in bondage. I say this to encourage anyone who is in the thick of any trial - HE NEVER wastes an opportunity to SHINE his GLORY! We just have to hang on.

I will say on another note, I tear up as I pack my children. I am overwhelmed with all of the details and will it be hot where we are all going or cold. It is so far and such a long trip. I am also struggling because I am over packer being forced to be conservative. Tomorrow I will leave for FL with all of the children to go to my parents house. We looking forward to being able celebrating my brothers 16th birthday with him!! The only draw back, 7 hours in the car . . . I am the only adult. We will stay until Sun or Mon and then I will come home with only three, pack some more and then Wednesday the house will be very quite. I am confident they will all be VERY well taken care of - probably too taken care of if you know what I mean. We have the most wonderful family and friends!!! and even though some I am sure think that we have lost our minds - they still love and support us. BLESSED!

You would be very glad to know that I am only taking 4 bottles - at one point (in a previous post) I had 13 packed :) AND he may not even take a bottle. That gives you a better understanding of my packing theory - "Just in case I need it." I keep downsizing Grant's stuff - limiting myself to 1/2 of a suitcase for him. I can do it . . . I can do it.

Grant will be in our arms on November 29th!!!! and we have a CA appointment for December 7th in Guangzhou. GLORY!

WE ARE GOING TO CHINA!!!!

Yesterday our agency told us we have TA (travel approval)! I am so absolutely grateful to our gracious Lord for Grant. We are still ironing out the details. I am having to slow down my desire to jump on the next plane. I am so thankful to have a husband that can think clearly and reasonably in the center of excitement. He is a rock no matter what the circumstances and oh how God knows exactly what I needed in a husband. I adore Skip and I am thrilled that adoption is a part of our story - such an incredible adventure. God is so good!

Skip and I will be traveling alone. We are wanting to leave on Thanksgiving Day and hopefully we will have a Consulate Appointment (CA) on December 8th or 9th. I have no concerns about our travel, however, the children's plans are a different story. We will leave all 5 here - two will go to my parents (out of state)- one to Skip's parents (out of town) and two will stay here with friends. I know our children will have a great time on their vacations away from home - and very well taken care of. It is just difficult to ask so much from our family and friends. Two weeks to iron out all the details, pack for 8, and get prepared to receive such a beautiful gift.

- We are praying for wisdom, discernment, guidance, and for Grant's heart.

Happy Fall!

Happy 5th Birthday Quinn!

Quinn at 2!

Quinn at 5!

The Double Light Saber inspired this . . .


All of a sudden during the opening of his presents, Quinn broke out in dance. We have no idea where he got his moves, perhaps watching his sisters. It was hysterical -

So thrilled about his gifts!

I love the clothes combination - comfort is very important :) He has these two pair of shorts that he insists on wearing after school.

It was a such a grand celebration. I just cannot believe he is already 5!

Fall Festival at CCPS

One of Quinn's Girl Friends

Friends

"Sure do wish this chair would recline while I enjoy my lunch."

Big Smile with Food

Full of Joy

Hay Ride

"Big Sisters are thee best!"

Every year the preschool has a fun fun fall festival. It is the same every year - my children love that it does not change. I love how exhausted we are when we come home for a long nap!

Wordless Wednesday

The Veil

This adoption journey has not been easy, but it is beautiful. There have just been some bumps that I have been to confused about to share. The clarity has finally come and I so hope I can articulate what I have learned.

I have to rewind back to October 2008 when we first started our journey to adopt. (Well really it started in March of 2008 when Skip said absolutely NO!) Skip and I had gone on a retreat and we had fallen in love with Faith - a precious little girl at New Day Foster Home. The privilege to be a part of New Day and her life has been incredible. Anyway, on this trip I was deep in prayer about how badly I wanted Faith to be our daughter, but I was afraid to ask God. Skip and I talked about it, I mostly cried because I did not know what if. What if I asked Him and He said no? What if by asking I could somehow mess up his plan for us? What if . . . what if I go down this path and I get so attached and she is not our daughter? I just know I could not stand the pain. What if . . . . I was so full of fear - the fear of hurting. We really felt like God spoke to our hearts that weekend to ask for Faith. I thought it was a done deal, I just knew we had a lot of paperwork to do quickly.

As the months passed we did grow more and more attached to this beautiful little girl through celebrations, wonderful pictures, and milestones in her life. The papers were finished and the CCAA had not said no, so in our minds it was still happening. And why would God say ask, and then say no?

It was the end of February and Skip called me with the devastating news, Faith's file had gone out on the shared list AND someone else had locked it. In one phone call, she was gone and so was my dream. It did not help for people to say, but isn't it wonderful she has a family? or you really need to focus on the bigger picture. My heart hurt so badly, I could not see beyond anything. I was very angry with God crying out, "But you told me to ask!" I wanted to know what kind of God tells you to ask for something and then doesn't give it? I also wondered if I was crazy and the voice I heard in my heart was something I made up. It was very difficult to imagine how I could ever trust hearing him again. The only thing I could hear from all the pain was, "she was your invitation." That did not help either because I wanted for her to be so much more. Grieving is so incredibly complex.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. I all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.

As we waded through the disappointment and loss, I kept waiting for her new family to contact New Day, as most families adopting do and there was no sign of her being matched. The first 4 months we kept wondering which way to go - desperately looking for any sign and we just kept hearing No. We did not know if we should wait for her or not. ? Wondering all the time if the lack of a sign meant that perhaps eventually she would be our daughter or if we just had to wait. That was not an easy time either.

When we felt like we should proceed with the adoption and commit to an agency, we called the agency that matched her file. They confirmed that she did have a family and they had received PA - double checking that this was the right little girl.

We were matched with our son in July and we still had not seen any signs that Faith had been adopted. I have prayed and prayed for the veil to be lifted - to better understand why. Please do not get me wrong - I am crazy about Grant and I am so thankful he is our son. I just know that God would not waste my tears.

This morning, I got Faith's October update, 1 year ago we asked, and it said she has a family. As I read her update I cried and cried. Sweet Amelia kept handing me the dirty dish rag to wipe my tears. THIS WAS NOT HOW THE STORY WAS SUPPOSE TO END!!!!!! Is all I could think.

After I emailed a couple of friends, I began scrubbing the floors we uncovered under carpet - beautiful hardwood with paint and dried up wallpaper and yuck. As I scrubbed and scrubbed the song, God Bless The Broken Road That Led Me Straight to You kept running through my head. (Watched Hannah Montana The Movie this weekend). FINALLY IT CLICKED! I saw beyond the veil! PRAISES!!!!!!!

When we stepped into adoption, Skip was not on board - at all. I really believe his love for me is what made him say yes, but God needed to change his heart. After we asked the agency to ask for Faith's file, Skip adored her as much if not more than me. There was no questioning where his desire to adopt came from after this happened. "She was (a part of) your invitation."

We also were very fearful about certain SN and did not want to consider a heart baby. When we lost her file, we threw our arms open wide and for a time pursued a little boy with a very serious heart defect. ONLY GOD could change our hearts so dramatically. Our son, Grant has an ASD, congenital heart disease, and delayed growth. I assure you we would have never considered adopting him in the beginning.

He has shown me that He is enough. I am doing a Beth Moore Bible study on Esther and she has a segment on fear. She asked us to fill in the blank: What if ________, then ______. As I scrubbed and remembered my plea, "What if I ask and then we do not get her?" THEN ME! (GOD) - I am enough to carry you through ANYTHING. The fist blank is for your fear, the second blank is GOD. He did carry us through and he was faithful - even if it did not turn out how we had planned in the beginning and at times it did not feel good. As I look back, if this was the path that we had to take to get us to Grant - I would do it again and again. The kind of God that says ask and then doesn't give is the God that has plans so much bigger than my little mind can comprehend. I have also never felt so loved by my Savior - he is truly more than enough and we do not have any idea of the grandness of what he has in store for ALL of us.

Thank you God for Faith's family and for the huge impact that tiny little girl made in my heart!

I have never been so ready to go and get my son.


UPDATE: The floors I scrubbed are spotless - just in case you were wondering :).

Grant's Birthday Party!

Today I received Grants's birthday party pictures. It looks like they got him up from his nap and the celebration began. I LOVE the cake complete with a firework on top. He looks a little frightened - at almost 40 I too might have been a little nervous about the flame.
I wonder if it is as good as it looks? Have to try it out in China."Mmmmmm"

Any ideas about the red dot?
It is amazing how this girl can feed a two year old frosting and not have a lick on him. How did she get him to keep his hands on the table?
"Whew, sensory overload, can I go back to my nap?"

Article 5 - Visas - The Flu

Today started out to be such an exciting day because we found out the only thing we are now waiting for is the CCAA to sign off on our papers. Once that is done they will send us our TA. This is great news and perhaps/maybe we will travel around the end of November. It is all becoming so real and I go from being so excited to scared to paniced about the 5 we will leave here.

We also received our VISAS today!!!!!

And then Grace came home with a high fever and other symptoms similar to her sister, Olivia. Olivia is just now getting over the flu.

Fortunately, after our 3 day weekend last week we have a semi-cleared out bedroom to for quaranteen. We decided to move Olivia and Annabel upstairs. They were in a little room off the kitchen - very far the the rest of us. The transfer involved reshelving and paint two closets, moving Grace from her own room to share a room with Amelia and moving Annabel and Olivia to what used to be Grace's room. (confusing I know) I also transfered the children's clothes from summer to winter - CHAOS! DISASTER!

The rooms are almost finished and they turned out really cute as our girls are quiet the decorators! :)

Quinn and Grant will share a room - I hope. I have never had a toddler and a child share a room and I pray it works. The last three days with Grace and Amelia together have been okay, although Amelia is a talker! I have a very dear friend that has promised me for years that it will work - Amy it rest on you! Anyway, we will use the room down by the kitchen for guests and sick children - Gee wanna come stay with us?

So for the next few days, Grace will rest on mattress sitting on what used to be Olivia and Annabel's floor. The guestroom/sick room is our next big project! and the list goes on . . . praying we can finish most before we travel.

It Is All About Perspective

"This is my daddy and mama!"

When Quinn's teacher asked him to search through magazines to find a picture of his parents this is what he picked. I cannot quite put my finger on exactly what is so funny about his choice!
What do you suppose this this an advertisement for?
It made my day!

Happy Birthday Grant!

Little Yinan is two! Oh how we wish we could all be there to celebrate with him. I have sent gifts and hopefully he will have a cake delivered today. We are about to go to bed - he is about to celebrate his big day - half a world away. My heart is very heavy. I do wish we could have brought him home by now. I am trusting His timing, some days are just more difficult than others. I am also sad thinking about all the orphan's lives that are not celebrated.

Birthday blessings sweet Grant!

Kissable!

Almost Two Years Old!

After a longgggg day of home schooling I received such a wonderful gift - Updated pictures of Grant!!!! There is no greater gift while you are waiting to adopt your child. I am shocked at how he has grown, well let me say grown hair. We received a medical update on him last week that made me sad. He has not gained any weight, but he has grown 2 inches. He is so small for his age and he should be putting on the pounds. I think he has left his foster family and returned to the orphanage and perhaps that is the reason for the lack of weight gain.

He looks adorable in these pictures and seeing them has really calmed my heart. I have heard so many wonderful things about his orphanage and I believe they are taking good care of him.

We are so hoping that we are about 40 days away from receiving a travel approval from China. My heart will melt when I am able to kiss those precious cheeks.