Wordless Wednesday

sparkle

Horse Show

Family

Annabel
cantered the course

I was very surprised to see this little pony move so quickly. Annabel said, "It's all in the reigns, other people just pull to hard and slow their horses down."
("other people" refers to her cautious sister, Olivia)
Well done

Olivia full of joy after her ride

A sweet long awaited victory

Olivia and Annabel's first horse show! Oh my you would have thought is was their wedding as I sat and cried tears of joy for them. They have waited five years to be able to dress up and be in an official show. I loved watching them and I am so very proud of all their hard work.

The girls scored one point within each other - not sure how I feel about them competing against each other. They do not mind.

Jeeah's Hope - Part 1

The first part of the story of Jeeah's Hope: Adoption and Foster Care Ministry.

During one of the most difficult time of our adoption journey I was crying one Sunday at the altar to God. We had just lost the dream of adopting a daughter from China, many of you know about Faith. My heart had been broken, we were so confused and lacked any direction. We had finished our dossier and it sat on someone's desk waiting . . . I was broken and really questioned what kind of God would allow me to feel so much pain.

One Sunday kneeling at the altar a sweet couple who was very familiar with our adoption journey met and prayed with us. As we finished praying and left the altar, they handed us a locally published magazine with a family on the cover who were adopting. This couple said, "perhaps you could get in touch with this family." I knew the wife on the cover from a few years past and had heard their family was in the process of adopting. I did not contact them, but kept in touch through mutual friends about their adoption.

Two years pass by and then this last summer I decided to call this friend, Emily, featured in the magazine. We had been home with Grant for awhile and she had also recently adopted a little girl from South Korea, Ellie Jeeah. For hours we would talk on the phone sharing our hearts for adoption and reflecting on our unique and challenging journeys.

Tragically, about two months later, her daughter Ellie Jeeah died of SIDS. Ellie was just under two years old and had only been home for less than a year. I have never been close to a family who had lost their child, I cannot even begin to imagine the pain of loosing a child. We had just become friends and I heard the Lord say, "walk with her." Honestly, I was so scared because of my insecurities and pride. I was so worried about what I was going to say, or if I would be able to say the right things, what if I called at the wrong time . . . the Lord said, "walk."

Through all the confusion of "why" the Lord used this family to show me what it looks like to be the daughter of a king. My new precious friend, Emily, having lost her daughter, walked through this tragedy as the beloved daughter of THE KING. She was grounded in who her Father is and did not waiver about His love for her and her daughter. She did not rest in the whys because she knew the character of her Father and believed without a doubt that He would turn Ellie's short life into something beautiful. Emily walked into the memorial service with her husband and 5 boys in such humble confidence and if that was not enough, she stood and gave her adoption testimony. Passionately she encouraging everyone to hear that God calls us all to care for the orphan. I was so taken by her radiance and grace and moved by the beauty of her heart as she honored God during such a difficult time. In lieu of flowers, their family asked for people to donate money to begin a fund to help others adopt.

I was obedient and chose to walk with her, all the time thinking that it was for her benefit. Do not get me wrong, I wanted to be friends, but I was afraid. I am sure I said really stupid things and to tell you how kind her heart is, she did not need an extra friend, God had blessed her with a large community of sweet friends. I had no idea at the time that my decision to walk with her was a blessing for me and that God had a much bigger plan which would unfold later. Looking back, I can see God so clearly wanted to show me more of Himself through her life.

Emily never wavered or grew tired during her grief - her foundation of Christ was built upon a rock and the death of her daughter was not separating her from the love of God. She was a witness and through Her testimony He was leading me to a place where I would begin to trust Him more and more.

Wordless Wednesday

Wordless Wednesday

Had to capture his cute little face.

Happy Chinese New Year

The Perkins and Friends Chinese New Year Celebration

It has been so long since my last post. I am going to try and at least post once a week - try being the key word. For the Chinese New Year we went to celebrate in another town with my other Chinese child. This last year, as I yearned to adopt again, the Lord brought a very special young woman into our lives, Kari. Kari lived with us after completing her masters while she looked for a job. Kari is from the Henen Province in China and has lived in the states for about 3 years. She moved to another town the beginning of fall ~ we miss her, but she is close enough to visit. How great that God put her in our lives. It was not time for us to adopt, but He knew my heart and my desire. This time the relationship was not strainned by emotional challenges ~ it instead a sweet friendship and a time of learning for both of us. Kari has taught me so much about the culture of China and she was able to be a part of a large family.

Kari and Grant

Can you believe he is turning into a little boy. He was such a baby when we met him in China and look at him now! Grant is sweet and passionate about the things he loves like star wars and candy. He is full of life and love and keeps everyone on their toes.

December Post

What a blessed holiday season! and oh what a needed break from home schooling. I really trailed off after Thanksgiving and most of my efforts were focused on getting Christmas organized. Although I finished shopping December 1st, I was still wrapping presents and searching for gifts in closets on Christmas Eve. I keep saying that one year I will make it simple, just not this year.

We celebrated having Grant home one year this month - I wanted to be in China again (never thought I would ever say that last December). Not an easy trip, but worth every single tear and bit of physical and emotional exhaustion. Grant continues to progress, he is now saying 3 word phrases, attempting potty train and can take off his clothes and dress himself. We were very proud that he decided to quit biting and was not asked to leave preschool (we were very close). We did start with a new speech pathologist - I believe this will be a big year of development for Grant and I think he will catch-up. I do not know when to push him or when to just wait. This lack of discernment easily leads to a battle of the wills - never pretty between a 3 year old and a 40 year old!

As I reflect on the past year I cannot believe the heart work God was able to do on me during such a trying and busy time. The work is not complete by any means, but I have learned so much about how to love despite what I receive . . . uggh it is a journey and I never realized until this year how shallow my ability to love has been. An incredible woman in our church has a Bible study in her home called the Love Walk. Her first lessons were on the different types of love and how our nature plays into to them. She then began a 4 week session on forgiveness - and then will dive into pride after the Christmas break. This Bible study has opened many opportunities for some real yuck in my thinking/heart to be exposed and healed.

End of Summer

It looks like I am only able to post at the beginning and end of a season.

I was sorry to see summer come to an end and I did not finish ALL that I intended to finish. It will all get done.

One of the most exciting parts of summer has been watching Grant grow and adjust even more. He is amazing! and precious and such a ball full of joy and excitement. I cannot imagine our lives without him. I cannot believe God chose me to be his mother. I love him so very much.

Recently, I received the translation of his Half the Sky report. This report begins when Grant arrived at the orphanage at 3 months old. His Half The Sky nanny wrote in the journal monthly and sometimes weekly. She was very honest and surprisingly open about Grant and her feelings towards him. It breaks my heart to read. Grant was a very sick baby and arrived at orphanage very underweight and hungry. He had reflux and refused to eat. She writes about how his face first thing in the morning lacked emotion and how he cried and cried. There were places that seemed as though she was praying by saying, "What am I to do, he needs so much and he is one of 20 children I have to take care of." He was very slow to grow and it took a lot of experimenting for her to figure out a way to feed him.

I will never forget an email I received from New Day asking for prayer for Forest. It was after Christmas and Forest had been placed back in his orphanage. The orphanage contacted New Day after a few weeks and told them Forest had lost his will to live and was no longer eating. Forest soon returned to New Day and as long as I live the picture of his emaciated little body will always remain in my mind. Little did I know that at that time, as we prayed fervently for little Forest, our son was also fighting for his life.

I will always be so very grateful for this angel in Grant's life. I believe her daily touch and smile, her tenderness and occasional candy, gave Grant hope to endure the difficult times. Thank you Lord for bringing him home.

Summer Kick-Off

Tomorrow is the last day of school! I am so excited for the GO GO GO to come to an end and for the lazy days of summer to begin. I always have grand visions heading into summer: organizing, reviewing all my home schooling curriculum, chore charts . . . The children also have their vision of a wonderful summer: trips to Brewsters, daily swimming, endless TV and computer, snacking, unmade beds . . . I so wish I was the Mama that shared their same vision - hoping to meet somewhere in the middle.

I do feel like during the summer I get more quality time with God. My quite time in the morning seems to last longer. I recently listened to a Beth Moore simulcast called Psalms 126 Reaping Sheaves of Joy - it was so timely and wonderful. She begins by talking about seasons in your life when you suddenly realize you have drifted away from God. I believe I am coming back from one of those times. So much of it has to do with business and what I have chose to spend my time on. I am so thankful our Father stands with open arms knowing we are coming back. How precious He is to welcome us back every single time. He is beginning to open my eyes to the harvest and I just love every moment of the discovery. I want so badly to constantly be active in the harvest and more than that I want to understand where I am to harvest with Him along side of me. It is very easy for me to look over here and there and jump into something that is anointed by Him and beautiful and rich BUT not where I have been called to be- I can so easily become passionate about His work and unfortunately that takes away from where I am needed the most. I am seeing that with 6 children my call has become less and less outside the home. Many days I have a hard time facing the enormous issues we can have at any given time - I'd much rather go on over to someone's field - I am unattached there. I consistantly surrender my walls of protection and selfish ambition which does bring so much peace. Knowing He is doing the laboring as long as I am depending upon Him and not what I can do. I am such a "people person" and what I understanding is my people are under this roof. I cannot predict what the balance will look like and I am sure I have a lot more of my agenda to surrender, but God is always good and full of adventure!
It is going to be a great summer.

Exhaling!

Two & Cute!

The month of May is tremendously busy! Wow - end of the year everything! We move from preschool to school to dog trainer to speech therapy to OT playgroup to soccer games and then to ballet. . Dr appointments, board celebrations, graduations. It seems as though nothing slows down and I am so exhausted and missing my friends. I am looking forward to the end of May when we can come back together as a family and enjoy each other and really enjoy time with friends!

I am very thankful for a large family, but months like May make it seem like we have 20 children! We are adjusting to some better routines and by force I am becoming more organized - still have a long way to go.

Olivia is finishing up the 5th grade - WHOOOA. We are so very proud of her and the light she has been to her school!

Annabel is finished with 4th grade home schooling and we have learned so much together - the highlight of her year was finally getting her soon to be big dog, Pilot. She has done so well training her!

Grace is becoming such a talented ballerina and quite a soccer star. She is almost finished with kindergarten and can read more than we would like for her to read :). The tooth fairy came for her sister Annabel this week and for some reason the tooth fairy was a little low on cash so she left a note and accidentally signed it: Love, The Easter Bunny (Opps!)
That was a bit confusing for a 6 year old -

Quinn has done great in K-4 and loves his little school and teachers. He has played Co-ed soccer this year - I am so proud of how he treats the little girls on the opposing teams. He will not steal the ball nor will he even approach them if they have it - how do you encourage anything different? AND he has his younger sister Amelia always reminding him that "it is ladies first!" in a not so kind voice at times.

Ameila has finished K-3 and talks to anyone she sees about dogs. She wants to know if you have a dog, if your dog goes POO POO! What your dogs name is (and she will let you know if it is a good name or not!) - There are only so many pre-discussions you can have to avoid absolute embarrassment. You never know what she is going to say - she has more opportunity for correction than any of the children - We have many talks together.

Grant continues to amaze us. He has gone through some times recently where I have had to leave to room in order to not scream. He is really been testing boundaries - he is a two year old and I do not know how I forget that some days. His newest trick is to dump his milk behind his highchair in the morning. His speech teacher has insisted I give him an open cup to exercise his mouth muscles - We are going to make it through this! He did have to have all 4 front teeth pulled because of infection. It was an emergency situation and the dentist had to do it asap. It was very difficult because he only had gas and shots to easy the trauma and pain. He did GREAT and by 6pm he was jumping around. I think his little mouth feels so much better - the little nerves on 3 of the teeth were exposed. He is also eating a lot more - Praises! Any day I anticipate his speech taking off - he is really working hard and so very determined. OH and we are not biting anymore!!! That is a very big hurdle - Everyone who meets Grant is so amazed by the joy in his little spirit - he is a delight! It has been very interesting to watch the attachment process - it is coming and he knows we are something more than passing people in his life. He also allows himself to receive the love from a hug - and sighs with enjoyment! Precious!

Oh, I almost forgot to mention! I turned 40! It was the best birthday -Ever! Skip surprised me with a dinner party with friends - Elizabeth who recently moved to TN even came! It was grand! and too boot he gave me a 12 passenger VAN! - WHITE! It is the greatest car in the world! I love it! I cannot understand the puzzled looks from my friends - more than 3 have said, "is that really your car?" And the greatest thing is . . . it is a little less than half way full!

I will post on our new addition Pilot this weekend -

I am so very thankful it is FRIDAY!!!!!
Blessings to everyone!

Easter 2010

It is only through the power of his blood shed on the cross that I am blessed with the fullness of who he is. It is only through the Crucifixion that we have life and have it in abundance. Praises to our Lord! To you all the glory for this beautiful day.

I still have to do a double take when I see all of our children - I am blessed beyond measure for these amazing precious jewels!

Yes, this is Grant, OUR SON, all dressed up in the family heirloom baptism gown. I know he looks to boyish to be wearing a dress - yes, he is a little older than the babies who wore it before him, but it is part of tradition and it fits! He was such a great sport while we dolled him up for his big day. This gown is one of two hand made my Skip's mother. They are french hand sewn and are made of the finest cotton and lace. The gowns have been used by 12 grand children!
(half ours!) All Twelve


For a baby gift at Olivia's shower (11 years ago), Skip's mother surprised me with a slip to go under her christening gown. Now, all six children will have their monogram and the date of their baptism embroidered on the slip - such a treasure!
SO ADORABLE!!!





Skip's father baptized Grant on Easter Sunday. He is one of the greatest blessings in our lives. I cannot wait to get to heaven to see the many people he has brought into God's kingdom. He is such a beautiful example of the heart of God and has the gift of love beyond anything I have ever seen.

4 Months Home

It has been a long time since I have posted. On days I have time to sit down at the computer, I only have time to read my favorite blogs and then it is time to get back moving again. I love reading my friend's blogs and am so thankful I am to be able to keep up with all the amazing things God is doing!!!

We have had a really exciting few months. Grant is doing so very well!!! I am amazed and in such awe of his determination. He is running, beginning to talk AND he will identify ME in a crowded room as his mama!! He now loves to hug and instead of me asking him for a kiss, he will ask me and let me tell you it melts my heart.

Speaking of his heart - it is doing very well. We will follow up with the cardiologist next year and continue to watch his ASD. The biggest obstacle we are facing now is Grant needs major dental work. Under general anesthesia they need to do 7 caps and two extractions in addition to some nerve work. Grant's abscessed teeth do cause him some pain and make eating solid food difficult. His weight gain and growth have slowed down. Because of Grant's heart condition, we will have the surgery at a Children's Hospital in Atlanta - I am so very thankful for the pediatric dentist who has decided to go the extra 100 miles for Grant. We are praying (and would love for you to join us) that God would open some rather large doors for Grant's surgery. Our medical insurance will not cover Grant's general anesthesia (privately funded insurance plan), which means we are paying for 2.5 hours of surgery out of pocket - dental will cover only two of the caps. We are asking our medical insurance to please reconsider their decision to not cover dental anesthesia or for the hospital to cut us one heck of a deal! Right now our our insurance company feels like strapping him down 5 different times is a practical solution for his dental needs. ?
It has been very interesting because open heart surgery would not have cost nearly as much. We never knew anything about privately funded insurance plans until now. Grant is covered fully by our insurance, but if you read the fine lines of a privately funded plan, some things are not covered regardless of the law. But with that said, most things are covered and we are blessed with being able to see many wonderful doctors.

The dentist who has agreed to see Grant is a special medical needs pediatric dentist. He is encouraging us to get Grant tested for DiGeorge Syndrome. DiGeorge Syndrome is a syndrome where there is a deletion of the 22nd Chromosome. Grant dose have a few of the markers of DiGeorge, but I will be very surprised it the test is postive. I am so crazy about every single cell of his DNA and if he dose have DiGeorge, it will not change one single thing about the wonderful things God has planned for his life. This is one strongly determined and smart little boy.

Wordless Wednesday